My Baby's Teddy Bear

Annaliese has a teddy bear that she received for Christmas last year from my aunt and uncle (her great Aunt and Uncle).   Even as a little 3 month old baby, she always loved the way that the teddy felt.  It's soft furry back, plush head and silk "belly" blanket leaves her feeling safe and secure.

3 months old with teddy

She sleeps with Teddy every night.  Her eyes light up when she sees her teddy.  We even bribe her to walk to us by holding Teddy.  This works only half of the time...  

We've found it.  The security toy/animal/blanket that this little girl will most likely invite to all of her tea parties, play dress up with, and drag around with for years to come.  It reminds me of part in the movie Mr. Mom where the little boy had a small anxiety attack when his dad asked him to give up his "Woobie" (or blankie).

Here's a clip from the movie where dad (played by Michael Keaton) is convincing his son why he needs to give up his "Woobie".

I had a security toy/animal when I was a baby too.  How I came to know this story was my dad had won my mom a little stuffed raccoon at a carnival.  He gave it to her and said that this is for our little baby.  Of course back then they didn't know if I was a boy or a girl yet because technology wasn't advanced enough yet.  So the day I was born I was given a little stuffed raccoon.  It slept in the crib with me.  It was my best friend.

Funny side story- One night, when I was about 2 years old asleep in my crib, my parents heard some noise outside my opened window.  They closed the window and went back to sleep as I was okay and unharmed.  The next morning, as my dad went to go take the trash out to the trash cans, which happened to be outside my window, he saw my little raccoon sitting on top of the trash can.  My dad found this to be hilarious...my mom, not so much.  ;)

This is what my raccoon looks like today.  I named him "Re" when I was a kid.  My mom says I named him after trying to say my middle name "Marie"...I guess I just ended up with "Re" for short.  He used to be a lot thicker...OK, actually he used to be a completely different raccoon.  I think after me having him so long and him taking a slight kid-friendly beating, my mom had to completely remake Re...(maybe that's why his name is Re, for Remake...) Anyway, my talented mother created this raccoon I think when I was around 2 or 3.  I think she did pretty darn good, except he is a little non symmetrical.  ;)  Also his eyes are scratched up, his fur is non existent and you can almost see his stuffing, his mouth is almost gone, his tail is almost falling off, and he's pretty flat.  But he's my Re and I've always been very protective of him.  When my brother and I would fight as kids, he knew that the best way to get to me was to hide Re or take him "hostage" (we were a little cruel to each other - I guess that's normal)  ;)

Present Day "Re"

Since Justin and I found out we were going to have a baby and had put together a nursery, I placed Re on a shelf overlooking the crib.  It may sound funny or even ridiculous, but this little stuffed animal has been the only constant thing in my childhood.  Through moving across country and back and my parents divorce he was my constant friend and tear-catcher.  I told myself a long time ago that I would give him to my first born, so when Annaliese is old enough to understand, I will give him to her and tell her the story of how I was given him and why he stayed with me through life.  I hope Re is as special to her, as he is to me.  Re and Teddy will be lifelong friends.  :)

Do you have a stuffed animal or blanket from your childhood that you've kept?

Gone Too Soon

Another young angel was deemed today

God touched down and took his suffering away

His smile is what I remember most of all

I saw it frequently from down the large halls

We were classmates throughout high school

He never made me feel like I was "uncool"

It breaks my heart to know that he's gone

With his close family and friends who will try to carry on

I didn't have to know his inner thoughts and cares

To know that he had a huge heart to share

There's so many people who speak highly of him

That light in his soul will never be dim

While writing my blog post for the day today, I was informed that a classmate of mine had passed away from a brain tumor.  He was my age...29-30 years young.  Too damn young to go.  

Rest in Peace, Dustin Pheil

Ode To Headaches

Blah!

Today's daily post of the month (For NaBloPoMo), has been brought to you by that pounding feeling in your cranium that hurts sometimes.

Justin and I unfortunately get headaches pretty often.  I believe mine are more contributed to my allergy issues.  For example, just within the last hour, my throat has started itching, I've started sneezing and my nose has gotten stuffy...and slowing I feel a headache coming on.  Justin went to bed with a headache last night and woke up with a headache this morning.  We believe his headaches are from stress from his job (and life of course) and his eyes because he's at a computer probably 70% of his day every day, about 60% of that is for work and 10% of that is for personal use... I say this as I'm typing on a computer.

Ahem.

Headaches are common.  I guess because of that, I can say they are natural, but it doesn't make me like them any better.  Especially when I think of all of the Tylenol and Aleve I've taken in my life to rid the headaches I've had.  All of those chemicals that Justin and I have put into our bodies just to get rid of that headache temporarily, because it's bound to come back...and sometimes with a vengeance.  It doesn't even seem worth trying to get rid of them.  Blah!

Why, oh why?

Why can't a week go by without one or the other getting a damn headache?

Breathe in deeply through your nose.

And out through your mouth.

Repeat.

It helps, but only so much.  Giving your brain deep and slow oxygen helps a headache lessen.

That is all.

*I apologize this post is short...I need to get away from a computer screen and go be in a dark room.

Come back tomorrow :)

Celebrating Halloween

Trick or Treat!

Halloween used to be one of my favorite holidays as a kid!  I used to go to school in my costume, we usually had an "easy day" at school and ended it with a party with lots of candies and sweets!  What is there not to like about that?

Well since elementary school, fast forward 2 decades and I haven't really been in the Halloween spirit...

I mean I loved staying home and handing out candy to the tiny tots who would come by with such pride in their eyes as they got to become someone else for a day.  They show up as their favorite movie character, or hero.  Or their favorite animal or fictional princess.  It's such a fun day when you're a kid!

I have also always loved seeing even the VERY creative adults and their costumes for Halloween parties.  It's amazing the things that people can think of and make for a Halloween costume!

But...

I have never been to a Halloween party as an adult.  Since I moved out of my parents house, I have only once stayed home and given out candy to the little Trick or Treaters.  I have never had children to send to school in a costume with spooky decorated cupcakes.

As you know, Annaliese was born last year on October 11.  Justin and I had plans of getting newborn pictures taken of her in an adorable little spotted ladybug cocoon with an antenna hat that I had someone make for her from Etsy.  Well with struggling from lack of sleep and difficulty breastfeeding, we never got around to scheduling pictures right away.  By the time she was 2 weeks old, we were setting up dates with a photographer and then it snowed, and quite a bit.  We didn't really feel comfortable taking our newborn out in the snow, so we thought we would wait.  Well...then on October 27, my Yiayia (grandmother) passed away and on October 29 we ended up taking a 3 1/2 hour long ride in the snow to New Jersey for her funeral which happened to be on October 31.

Needless to say I was a wreck.  I probably cried for a full 24 hours.  While we were on a huge life "high" from just having our daughter being brought into this world, I was almost 3 weeks postpartum still figuring out how to be a parent on no sleep, and breastfeed and lost a precious family member.  We had to drive in a blizzard with a newborn and were forced to leave her with close friends of the family in New Jersey for hours at a time so that my husband could stay with me for the services and support me while I mourned my sweet grandmother.

We woke up that Halloween Monday morning, again with no sleep the night before, and tried to rush to get ready to take Annaliese to our friend's house then make it to the funeral.  On the way there I can remember looking out the window and thinking of how many people woke up and were so excited that day because it was Halloween.  Kids got to put on their carefully thought out costumes and go to school, have a Halloween party, ...have fun.  It seemed like everyone was having fun on that day except my family and I.  It wasn't fair.

We made it through the long Greek Orthodox service.  I knew my Yiayia had touched many lives in her long 93 years of life.  I knew she was an exceptional woman.  She was the last of her 6 siblings to survive, she was a strong and supportive wife of 58 years to my late Papou (grandfather) who passed away in 2004, she was a tough, loving and admirable mother of 4, a grandmother of 8 grandchildren, and a great grandmother of 5 great grandchildren.  Knowing that my dad had just lost his mother...and just being born into motherhood myself, my heart ached, I'm sure even more than it would have, had I not been a mother.

Everyone had a headache from the strong smell of incense and from crying off and on all day.  All I wanted to do was be reunited with my little baby girl.  Instead of going to pick her up, we all gathered at a local social club to have brunch.  Justin and I left there after we managed to get some food in our stomachs and went to go pick up Annaliese.  We arrived to our friend's house, thanked them a hundred times for watching her on an understandably short notice and left to go back to my dad's house and prepare to leave the next day to return home.

Halloween was over before it really ever began for us, a new family of three.  We never got to have Annaliese's pictures taken in the little outfit that I had made before she outgrew it.

This Halloween, seemed terribly similar   With it being my Yiayia's one year memorial at the Greek church, we had plans to leave this past Saturday, go to the service on Sunday and return home on Monday.  Well with hurricane Sandy creeping towards the New Jersey coast, we made the right decision to stay home and prepare for a possible power outage here and not literally head into the storm.

While all of my family in New Jersey and many of my friends here the tri-state area of Maryland, Pennsylvania and West Virginia were left with utter devastation and no power, we tried to make the best of the situation, since we weren't able to be with them.  We had purchased another ladybug costume since we were unable to "dress" Annaliese up last Halloween.  Although it was in the low 40s here, we still snapped some pictures outside before the trick or treaters started touring the neighborhood.

I do have to say, Annaliese did make one cute little ladybug.  :)

Hopefully next Halloween will be a better one.  I'll start my prayers now for a stormless Halloween week next year.  We'll plan a cute costume for Annaliese and take her trick or treating for the first time.  It should be fun!  I'm already looking forward to it :)

Can You Imagine?

Can you imagine a storm over 1,000 miles wide?

Can you imagine a storm hovering over the place you were born and raised as it's changing the way it will look forever?

Can you imagine your home being broken and battered through 80mph winds and 20 foot floods?

Can you imagine being evacuated and hiding out in a shelter with your family not knowing what could happen to you and your left behind property?

Can you imagine coming back to your home after doing the right thing by leaving, but returning to a house that is completely unrecognizable?

Can you imagine being without power for days and possibly weeks at a time?

Can you imagine having no heat in 30 degree temperatures and not being able to make a hot meal or drink  to keep warm?

Can you imagine having a very important doctor's appointment to get to but can't even reach the office because your road is blocked and can't contact them on the phone because the phone lines and cellular service are down?

Can you imagine your home of decades and neighborhood burning to the ground and losing EVERYTHING because of a gas leak?

Can you imagine traffic lights out for miles, trees down on main roads and 2 hour wait lines for gasoline in the most densely populated area of the country?

Can you imagine a water levy breaking and water comes gushing towards you as you're in the car with your 2 and 4 year old children and they become missing?

Can you imagine being in a hospital, in labor with contractions 30 seconds apart, and the power going out?  Needing to be carefully carried on a hospital bed, in light only shining from a dim cell phone, down 9 flights of stairs and be transported to another medical facility so you can safely deliver your baby?

Can you imagine a hospital just lost power, is in complete darkness and has 20 premature babies with breathing tubes that need to be transferred to a place with power to survive?

Can you imagine a stranger with electricity building an "internet cafe" for the neighborhood to charge their cell phones and use their WIFI so they can update their concerned friends and family?

Can you imagine a community coming together to go knock on doors to make sure everyone is ok?

Can you imagine hundreds of companies giving away food and money to help the people who have lost everything?

Can you imagine the amazing service people becoming heroes to families who were stranded on their rooftops as water rushed in and filled their house to the ceilings? 

Can you imagine?

The words devastation and destruction are an understatement when it comes to Hurricane "Super Storm" Sandy.  Even if you could imagine any of these things, I'm sure you would still be in disbelief.  There are many courageous people who have lived through this, some are my family and friends.  However, there were people who were not as fortunate to live to tell about their feat and survival.  My prayers for every single one of these people have been unending since learning about this horrific storm.  I am so thankful that although we were in the direct path of the storm, it did not affect our power or heat source, but knowing there are so many still left with no heat or power and some left with nothing, makes it hard to rejoice.

I can tell you that every day, in every way, I am always thankful for what and who I have.  I encourage you to count your blessings and take a look at what you are blessed with, for it may not always be there.

I have accepted a writing challenge through BlogHer for the National Blog Posting Month of November to write a post a day.  This is my first challenge and I hope that it will keep me in the writing spirit, since I enjoy it so much.  Will you join me and the hundreds of others? :)

Here we go!